I do not pretend to know them and their personal ordeals. So I offer only general comments borne of public knowledge shared by RemDawg, the NESN color commentator and Youk, current Sox infielder.

They are learning how to cope with real and potentially increasing bodily and career decline, two emotional stressors that challenge all of us.  When the body fails us, thoughts of metaphorical and real death grip us.  How can you not start to contemplate and rehearse further decline when you awaken and find you are having a hard time breathing? 

Youkilis revealed this bummer after having been hit so many times in the ribs by a pitched ball this season.  Remy revealed the aftermath of breathing challenges post lung cancer and an ensuing debilitating infection. Both were faced with the possibility of premature career and income loss.  Yes , Death and Taxes are inevitable but we would like some control of the pacing of our destiny.

And with real or imagined loss, anger is not far behind.  For men, the challenge of expressing rather than suppressing such anger requires just the kind of skills that are rarely taught in this stiff upper lip society, especially in the world of elite sports.  Many are taught to act like jerks instead. For example: instances where management at all levels bury their head in the face of never ending  and escalating revenge by head- and rib- hunting pitchers.

It makes no sense:  given that life is a series of necessary losses. We need to teach the skill for expressing — in a balanced manner — feelings of loss, shame, embarrassment and anger. That means without too much macho or too much passivity, the types of extremes these highly achieving and respected men found so tempting in recent weeks. 

We need to begin the education of the emotions, including stress management,  at the same time we start to teach reading, writing and arithmetic!

Given the patience and emotional supportiveness apparently supplied by Red Sox and NESN management and the respective teams/work community, these guys return to the lineup this week should be very successful. And I suspect that they will be offering emotional education in their other “home”  to their children and grand children — the type that may not have been so easily available to them and their closest friends at an early age.

Their successes make me proud to be a man and to be helping men mature in their joyful relationships with themselves, their partners, significant others and team mates.